Status Update
So here we are. The end of my first semester of college. Sure did fly, huh? Similar to that of a paper plane, one may dare to say. We also are in the holiday season (whoopdewoop and hickorydock), which is always a swell time of the year. The end of the year is always a great time because people breath a deep sigh of relief of "thank God I made it through this year," and for just a little bit of time people are blissfully unaware of the fact that their problems will likely bridge into the next hour after midnight on January 1st. I love New Year's Eve and the concept of it. I love how people gather around and kiss each other when the ball drops. I love how people say that the people you see on New Year's Eve are the people you are destined to be with for the rest of the year, and whatever you are doing when the clock hits midnight is what you will be doing for the next year. For me, I am usually eating asian food and watching stupid movies when it hits midnight, so my yearly predictions are always accurate. I love that people make new year's predictions and dedicate themselves to changing something about their life as if the calendar flipping a page really makes that big of a difference. We give January first such a weighty significance when it really means nothing but putting a new number on important sheets of paper. But, I love that. I love the optimism in it. I love that we really believe that it is a new start. Especially now, for me, it really feels like a new start. I am in a new school, a different city, new friends, new responsibilities, new hobbies, my house has a new kitchen, I painted and changed my room, and soon it will be a new year. Lots of changes are going on. Usually I am pretty intimidated by change, as I get rather comfy in my life, but this time I am pretty happy with it. I mean, there are a lot of things I miss. I really miss my old high school friends, and I love seeing them over break, and I miss my parents and watching movies with them and them cooking for me, but, ultimately, the change is good. I feel like a new person.
It's really weird to have your college friends hang out with your old friends. In a good way I mean, but still weird. Weird because the two groups, for me at least, have very different ideas about my personality. To my college friends, I am spontaneous, outgoing, curious, and never able to be bored. To my high school friends, I am the one who stops them from getting arrested (the one time I wasn't with them they got a citation for being on an illegal bridge flossing their teeth. Well, the flossing wasn't it illegal, I just think it is fun to mention because I have the type of friends who get in trouble for adventures, not drugs, which is why I love them so much), and the one who often would rather just sit in the basement talking. And when the two factions meet, I always wonder what it is like for them to see the other side of me. Heck, they probably don't even notice. Isn't it funny how much I think about myself? I literally have a blog about my life as if people care about what is happening. I might actually be the cockiest person I know.
Been thinking about mirrors a lot recently. I remember in middle school we had to read this short story about a village of old ugly people who had never seen themselves before a traveling salesman showed up and gave everyone a mirror. Suddenly, a village once based upon love and non-caring folk, transformed into a village of vain and self-conscience folk who wanted to change everything about them. And then this of course got me thinking about Narcissus, the Greek dude who looked at himself in the reflection a lake all the time. And then I started thinking about Michael Jackson, who has an entire song about the Man in the Mirror, except his take is much different. Jackson wanted to make a change starting with the man in the mirror, whereas Narcissus did not see a single thing to change in himself, he simply admired his face. And then this brings up the discussion of how do we analyze the short story then? Which interpretation do we use: Narcissus, or Michael Jackson? Did the village finally become aware of things that needed to be changed within themselves, thus progressing? That would be what Michael Jackson would say. Or, as Narcissus would counter, were they simple fascinated with themselves, rendering them addicted to cosmetic and useless issues. Do mirrors cause mental body image issues? What if you never saw yourself in the mirror, would you still care about if that shirt makes you look fat? I have this belief that you can never be self conscience if you do not see something to be self conscience of, which is why I rarely look in the mirror. I often leave my house or dorm without seeing what my outfit looks like or how ratty my hair is. When people stare at me, likely because my hair has not been washed or brushed in roughly 2.3 years, I like to tell myself that it is because I am the best looking human to ever stride the planet. But, if I had seen my hair before I left, I would know that they were staring at the rat's nest on my head. At least for me, as I am very aware of other people's perceptions of me, I do not like to look in mirrors often.
My cousin just found out that he is having his second child. When I congratulated him on his son, I brought up a discussion I have been asking people a lot as conversation starters: why are we not born nine months old? If life starts at conception, shouldn't we be nine months old at birth, not zero? And then, when you have been in the world for a month, you would be ten months old, so on and so forth. After debating for a while, my dad told me I clearly had too much time to think about such trivial matters and my uncle laughed and said it sounded like I needed to take more credit hours. And they are right, I have a ton of time on my hands. English majors have a pretty easy track, especially when their clubs only meet once a week, intramurals only take an hour per week roughly, and they don't have a job ... which is my life. However, as a fan of Whitman, Thoreau, and Emerson, one could argue that I am doing life just right. Actually, they would probably say I do not have enough time. Good old transcendentalism. I really am a fan. I do genuinely believe that love and pondering life are the only reasons for living. Well, for me, I mean people can find purpose in whatever works for them, that is the true meaning and beauty of life. You need to find your own purpose that uniquely fits you. Just like there is no one true religion that will work universally for everyone, there is no one universal purpose in life. Well, really it is the same argument, as religion tends to give people purpose in life. But, for me, thinking about life and loving those around me, that gives me purpose and meaning in this world.
I never use Facebook. I do not really even use Instagram anymore either, and I have always sucked at Snapchat. I do still love twitter. Anyway, this is my way of updating my status, or whatever the savvy kids call it these days. My blog is my way of keeping in touch with people I do not see a lot and letting them know how I am. I like it. I like uselessly writing about mundane things. Anyway, this was just an update.
It's really weird to have your college friends hang out with your old friends. In a good way I mean, but still weird. Weird because the two groups, for me at least, have very different ideas about my personality. To my college friends, I am spontaneous, outgoing, curious, and never able to be bored. To my high school friends, I am the one who stops them from getting arrested (the one time I wasn't with them they got a citation for being on an illegal bridge flossing their teeth. Well, the flossing wasn't it illegal, I just think it is fun to mention because I have the type of friends who get in trouble for adventures, not drugs, which is why I love them so much), and the one who often would rather just sit in the basement talking. And when the two factions meet, I always wonder what it is like for them to see the other side of me. Heck, they probably don't even notice. Isn't it funny how much I think about myself? I literally have a blog about my life as if people care about what is happening. I might actually be the cockiest person I know.
Been thinking about mirrors a lot recently. I remember in middle school we had to read this short story about a village of old ugly people who had never seen themselves before a traveling salesman showed up and gave everyone a mirror. Suddenly, a village once based upon love and non-caring folk, transformed into a village of vain and self-conscience folk who wanted to change everything about them. And then this of course got me thinking about Narcissus, the Greek dude who looked at himself in the reflection a lake all the time. And then I started thinking about Michael Jackson, who has an entire song about the Man in the Mirror, except his take is much different. Jackson wanted to make a change starting with the man in the mirror, whereas Narcissus did not see a single thing to change in himself, he simply admired his face. And then this brings up the discussion of how do we analyze the short story then? Which interpretation do we use: Narcissus, or Michael Jackson? Did the village finally become aware of things that needed to be changed within themselves, thus progressing? That would be what Michael Jackson would say. Or, as Narcissus would counter, were they simple fascinated with themselves, rendering them addicted to cosmetic and useless issues. Do mirrors cause mental body image issues? What if you never saw yourself in the mirror, would you still care about if that shirt makes you look fat? I have this belief that you can never be self conscience if you do not see something to be self conscience of, which is why I rarely look in the mirror. I often leave my house or dorm without seeing what my outfit looks like or how ratty my hair is. When people stare at me, likely because my hair has not been washed or brushed in roughly 2.3 years, I like to tell myself that it is because I am the best looking human to ever stride the planet. But, if I had seen my hair before I left, I would know that they were staring at the rat's nest on my head. At least for me, as I am very aware of other people's perceptions of me, I do not like to look in mirrors often.
My cousin just found out that he is having his second child. When I congratulated him on his son, I brought up a discussion I have been asking people a lot as conversation starters: why are we not born nine months old? If life starts at conception, shouldn't we be nine months old at birth, not zero? And then, when you have been in the world for a month, you would be ten months old, so on and so forth. After debating for a while, my dad told me I clearly had too much time to think about such trivial matters and my uncle laughed and said it sounded like I needed to take more credit hours. And they are right, I have a ton of time on my hands. English majors have a pretty easy track, especially when their clubs only meet once a week, intramurals only take an hour per week roughly, and they don't have a job ... which is my life. However, as a fan of Whitman, Thoreau, and Emerson, one could argue that I am doing life just right. Actually, they would probably say I do not have enough time. Good old transcendentalism. I really am a fan. I do genuinely believe that love and pondering life are the only reasons for living. Well, for me, I mean people can find purpose in whatever works for them, that is the true meaning and beauty of life. You need to find your own purpose that uniquely fits you. Just like there is no one true religion that will work universally for everyone, there is no one universal purpose in life. Well, really it is the same argument, as religion tends to give people purpose in life. But, for me, thinking about life and loving those around me, that gives me purpose and meaning in this world.
I never use Facebook. I do not really even use Instagram anymore either, and I have always sucked at Snapchat. I do still love twitter. Anyway, this is my way of updating my status, or whatever the savvy kids call it these days. My blog is my way of keeping in touch with people I do not see a lot and letting them know how I am. I like it. I like uselessly writing about mundane things. Anyway, this was just an update.
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