Help, I Need Somebody
It seems to be the trend right now to have quarter life crises. As a trendy human, I guess my body could not help but join this band wagon.
I need some genuine advice guys. Share your stories and help me out. I am going to provide a pro and con list regarding college, and I would really love input and personal experiences or advice.
I cannot decide if I should start thinking about this now and figure stuff out so that I can transfer half way through the year and have my credits transfer, still make friends, and hopefully keep or receive scholarships. Or if I should give my college a full year of chance before making a brash decision.
I should note that I did not want to go to this school. It was not near the top of my list, for various reasons, but circumstances brought me here. I should also mention that, yes, Anna, you were right, and that is not easy for me to admit, as you likely know.
So, I will start with cons because that is easier for me right now:
There is no air conditioning in my room.
The food is very subpar, if not bad, and difficult to be a vegetarian.
The gym is actual crap, and I spend time in there every time so that matters.
There are thirty some people from my high school here, and, even though I deeply love the new friendships I have made with some of them so far, I fear that my comfort in knowing I can rely on them is keeping me back from even wanting to meet new people.
No one here intrigues me. My friend described people here as "walking cauliflower" and that is disturbingly accurate. Everyone is bland and fake.
The showers are dark and people keep cutting their legs while shaving because they cannot see.
I have to walk really far to get to the kitchen to wash dishes.
I end up eating in my room a lot cuz I hate the food and this stops me from making friends.
I live far down the hall from a sink and a bathroom, which does not seem like a big deal until its 9 am and you have to poop super bad, or if you're in a rush and just want to drop your bags off before dinner but walking to your room adds like 5 minutes.
Obviously I realize a lot of this is petty.
Everyone here has friends. They are not open to meeting new people, and most of the people on my floor end their night on the phone with people from home, I myself can be guilty of this.
There are no options... down to the food and people. Nothing interesting is within walking distance.
I have terrible profs, although I do strongly believe this will change.
I keep forgetting I am in college and just not doing a ton of homework because it feels like summer camp. I do not even have a sink in my room... it feels like a massive retreat, not college.
The only way to make friends is to go to parties, and they get busted EVERY WEEKEND. Every party ever ends with getting busted. It is a simple fact here. Plus I hate groups of people that big anyway so I do not really wanna go which means I will never meet new people.
There are only three girls playing intramural tennis, so we are just playing on one day.
There are only two girl football teams so we do not even have a season, we just have a one day event.
My floor goes to bed at 10, or else they are out until 2, and there is no in between.
People are more religious than I expected.
Pros / things I know:
I know that I will not be content anywhere. I hate being away from my house and my family and my dog and my bed and shower and friends. I know that college is not going to be the best four years of my life, I am far too introverted. However, even if I spend every weekend in my dorm watching movies, reading books, writing, and doing homework, I would be okay with that if I were comfortable in my dorm. Meaning, I hate the social aspect here, but I know I will likely dislike it anywhere because college is constant socializing, even sleeping is with someone else, but so if I know that, I wish I would just feel comfortable... it is not homey here. I wish I had my own bathroom. I wish I had a bigger room with air conditioning. I wish I had food that didn't make me have horrible gas bubbles every time I digested it. I wish I could eat a full vegetarian meal instead of loading up on side dishes for dinner and calling it satisfying even though it leaves me hungrier than before. Primarily, I just want better amenities. Perhaps I am spoiled, but there are some super nice colleges out there, some of which are cheaper than my college, so why am I not doing that? Why can't I live comfortably?
I do like the people I have gotten close to here from my high school, and it would be hard to say goodbye to them.
People play machi koro with me when I want them to.
It is jesuit and has a lot of opportunities regarding retreats, traveling abroad, and immersion trips.
People are nice.
They have non-alcoholic events on the weekends to entertain us boring old folk.
Intramural soccer is a ton of fun and I like my team a lot.
There is a pingpong table in my dorm.
My floor is cool, kinda a bit too close almost.
Could use some guidance, personal stories or whatever guys. I am just not vibing here. I do not know how else to put it. Just really not feeling it. Pretty miserable.
I need some genuine advice guys. Share your stories and help me out. I am going to provide a pro and con list regarding college, and I would really love input and personal experiences or advice.
I cannot decide if I should start thinking about this now and figure stuff out so that I can transfer half way through the year and have my credits transfer, still make friends, and hopefully keep or receive scholarships. Or if I should give my college a full year of chance before making a brash decision.
I should note that I did not want to go to this school. It was not near the top of my list, for various reasons, but circumstances brought me here. I should also mention that, yes, Anna, you were right, and that is not easy for me to admit, as you likely know.
So, I will start with cons because that is easier for me right now:
There is no air conditioning in my room.
The food is very subpar, if not bad, and difficult to be a vegetarian.
The gym is actual crap, and I spend time in there every time so that matters.
There are thirty some people from my high school here, and, even though I deeply love the new friendships I have made with some of them so far, I fear that my comfort in knowing I can rely on them is keeping me back from even wanting to meet new people.
No one here intrigues me. My friend described people here as "walking cauliflower" and that is disturbingly accurate. Everyone is bland and fake.
The showers are dark and people keep cutting their legs while shaving because they cannot see.
I have to walk really far to get to the kitchen to wash dishes.
I end up eating in my room a lot cuz I hate the food and this stops me from making friends.
I live far down the hall from a sink and a bathroom, which does not seem like a big deal until its 9 am and you have to poop super bad, or if you're in a rush and just want to drop your bags off before dinner but walking to your room adds like 5 minutes.
Obviously I realize a lot of this is petty.
Everyone here has friends. They are not open to meeting new people, and most of the people on my floor end their night on the phone with people from home, I myself can be guilty of this.
There are no options... down to the food and people. Nothing interesting is within walking distance.
I have terrible profs, although I do strongly believe this will change.
I keep forgetting I am in college and just not doing a ton of homework because it feels like summer camp. I do not even have a sink in my room... it feels like a massive retreat, not college.
The only way to make friends is to go to parties, and they get busted EVERY WEEKEND. Every party ever ends with getting busted. It is a simple fact here. Plus I hate groups of people that big anyway so I do not really wanna go which means I will never meet new people.
There are only three girls playing intramural tennis, so we are just playing on one day.
There are only two girl football teams so we do not even have a season, we just have a one day event.
My floor goes to bed at 10, or else they are out until 2, and there is no in between.
People are more religious than I expected.
Pros / things I know:
I know that I will not be content anywhere. I hate being away from my house and my family and my dog and my bed and shower and friends. I know that college is not going to be the best four years of my life, I am far too introverted. However, even if I spend every weekend in my dorm watching movies, reading books, writing, and doing homework, I would be okay with that if I were comfortable in my dorm. Meaning, I hate the social aspect here, but I know I will likely dislike it anywhere because college is constant socializing, even sleeping is with someone else, but so if I know that, I wish I would just feel comfortable... it is not homey here. I wish I had my own bathroom. I wish I had a bigger room with air conditioning. I wish I had food that didn't make me have horrible gas bubbles every time I digested it. I wish I could eat a full vegetarian meal instead of loading up on side dishes for dinner and calling it satisfying even though it leaves me hungrier than before. Primarily, I just want better amenities. Perhaps I am spoiled, but there are some super nice colleges out there, some of which are cheaper than my college, so why am I not doing that? Why can't I live comfortably?
I do like the people I have gotten close to here from my high school, and it would be hard to say goodbye to them.
People play machi koro with me when I want them to.
It is jesuit and has a lot of opportunities regarding retreats, traveling abroad, and immersion trips.
People are nice.
They have non-alcoholic events on the weekends to entertain us boring old folk.
Intramural soccer is a ton of fun and I like my team a lot.
There is a pingpong table in my dorm.
My floor is cool, kinda a bit too close almost.
Could use some guidance, personal stories or whatever guys. I am just not vibing here. I do not know how else to put it. Just really not feeling it. Pretty miserable.
Ria! Come to Kent! Finish out your semester and then transfer! I think most of these problems could be so easily solved by moving home. I am really glad I lived at home the first two years of college because I am also spoiled and I like to be home and in a familiar place lol. College is a big change and having the comfort of home to go to at the end of the day is so valuable. Living at home really allowed me to focus on schoolwork. Now that I live away it is harder to be as disciplined with schoolwork, (I blame your sister entirely) but those two years of strictness means I can now afford to have more fun.
ReplyDeleteWe are both introverts so I can totally sympathize with the fear of not being social enough. I have thought a lot about how much I have missed out on because of my social anxiety in not only high school, but the bulk of my college career as well. However, I have no regrets about living at home. A huge advantage of going to Kent is that you can live at home for a bit and then move out with some friends if you choose! Use your first couple semesters to be a good student and meet some new people. Relax and enjoy being an adult who reaps the benefits of living with their parents. Take advantage of not having to work full time or worry about bills on top of school!
Kent also has a bunch of clubs and student organizations, so getting involved and meeting new people is super easy! Kent has a really diverse array of students so meeting interesting people is also super easy.
Anyway, I hope this helps. I know in whatever you choose to do you are going to do great! <3
Julia